Widow says cafe trips with strangers are a lifesaver
BBCA widow who attends a cafe where customers are encouraged to share tables with strangers said it had been a "lifesaver".
Lydia Martin, from Brackley, encouraged her husband Brian to go to the sessions to make new friends after he retired, before he died, but she never expected to go herself.
"Chatty Cafe was Brian's lifesaver for a while, and it has become my lifesaver as well," she said.
The Chatty Cafe scheme, which started in 2017, is a free social enterprise that helps tackle loneliness by encouraging people to meet and share conversations with strangers in their community.
Her husband was diagnosed with a brain tumour in 2020 and died a few weeks before his 70th birthday in March 2026.
Friends he made at the cafe visited him at his nursing home, which "really gave him so much joy", she said.
"The warmth and the embrace of friendship that you get, it's so hard to describe.
"You don't realise how much [friendship] means and what you've perhaps missed.
"You go through these traumas in life and this is where you realise that you need friendship.
"The hardest part is taking that first step through the door [but] you're welcomed with warmth and smiles, you go away feeling, why didn't I do this sooner?"
Jon Haslam started Brackley's Chatty Cafe, which takes place at The Crown Hotel every Tuesday from 15:00 untill 17:00, in 2022.
"My mum was in a care home during the pandemic and she craved company. I saw what this could be and how many lonely people like my mum there must be around.
"To have a chance to create something in Brackley that could bring people together just seemed like a chance I had to take.
"It's grown from strength to strength. People struggle to come the first time, but once they make it through the door they become a part of a community.
"Whether they come every week or twice a month or infrequently, it doesn't matter, they become part of something."
Many meet up outside of Chatty Cafe and go for walks or to the cinema together, he said.
"What I hoped for was a coffee and a bit of social time, what you actually get is a community.
"It's been really embraced by Brackley," he added.
James Ogier has attended the Chatty Cafe in Brackley for three and a half years.
"Once I came, I kept coming back. It's incredibly rewarding," he said.
"I've made so many friends, I've met so many people. It's been lovely, it's just a relaxing afternoon.
"We're very supportive of anyone who wants to join."
The founder of the Chatty Cafe scheme, Alex Hoskyn, was inspired to set it up after she went into a cafe with her newborn son and saw groups of people inside sat in silence.
"It got me thinking, would there be any opportunity for a table where people could sit together if they wanted to," she said.
"Volunteers are the key, It's having someone at the table that people see as a friendly face that makes the difference.
"The Brackley Chatty Cafe is the most attended in the UK, with 80 people going each week.
"I think because Jon's put so much effort in within the community to spread the word about it."
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