Abuse charity saved my life, says survivor

A mother has described how her marriage turned from a "love story into a nightmare" when she moved from Pakistan to the UK.

The woman, who does not want to be named, said her husband began physically and mentally abusing her after they got married and settled in Greater Manchester.

She said her partner did not tell her he had a child, and she realised her "fairy tale" was "based on lies".

She added that her partner repeatedly assaulted her and tried to strangle her when she was pregnant.

She praised Saheli - a charity in Manchester which supports Black, Asian and ethnic minority women experiencing domestic abuse - for "saving" her and helping her and her child build what she described as a "beautiful" life.

The 31-year-old, who the BBC is calling Sarah, said she was shocked when her now ex-husband first attacked her and so scared she never argued with him.

As well as the abuse, she said he gaslit her and told her she was too sensitive.

They were living with his parents and she said she felt isolated, with no family or friends nearby and no money.

The mother said she did not want to tell her family the truth.

Sarah said: "There's a taboo about being a divorced woman in Pakistan."

She felt "completely lost" and in despair when she was referred to Saheli by her GP, which she described as a "lifeline".

The charity invited her to a retreat for single mothers and their children, where she said she "slept peacefully" and laughed for the first time in years.

She said: "I finally felt secure."

Her child loved the activities, too, she said.

The charity then offered her a place at one of its refuges, where she and her child lived for six months while she "got back on my feet".

She said staff supported her in a range of ways, from looking after her child while she attended job interviews to helping her take driving lessons.

"They listened, too, and understood. They didn't judge my decisions either."

"When I see my life now, it is magical and I am really proud of myself," Sarah said.

"We have a beautiful house, I have my own car and we have nice holidays.

"I'm very positive for the future for us."

She said of Saheli: "They saved me.

"They gave me my life back."

Saheli is celebrating its 50th anniversary this year and is hosting a fundraising gala to help support its future work.

Meanwhile, the charity's chief executive, Priya Chopra, said Sarah's experience was all too common.

She said: "Our biggest achievement has been our survival when many Black, Asian and Minority women's refuges have closed and we've continued to survive independently."

Listen to the best of BBC Radio Manchester on Sounds and follow BBC Manchester on Facebook, X, and Instagram. You can also send story ideas via Whatsapp to 0808 100 2230.