Referee, 15, fears abuse will drive others away

A 15-year-old football referee has said abuse from parents and coaches could discourage other young people from taking up officiating.

Toby, who referees Dale Park Rangers Under-11s matches in Winterton, North Lincolnshire, said he had been shouted at and criticised by adults over decisions made during games.

"I don't feel like there's enough referees because of the abuse they get from parents and coaches," he said.

Lincolnshire Football Association said: "Under 18 referees are an integral part of grassroots football. They should absolutely be treated with the respect they deserve."

Toby has worked as a match official for more than a year and said he has faced criticism from the sidelines despite his age.

"They'll say I've made disgusting decisions, they'll shout, they'll complain, they'll try to put me off, they'll say they could have done a better job," he said.

When officiating, Toby wears a yellow armband to show he is under 18. The Football Association (FA) introduced them in 2019 to make it clear that the referee is a child.

The scheme was adopted by Dale Park Rangers earlier this year.

"I think it works. I haven't been assaulted. It works," Toby said.

Gary, Toby's dad, said when his son began refereeing a year ago he had to "step-in" when two parents shouted at him over a decision.

"A small number of parents" treat "kid's football as though it's the Premier League", he said.

"We've got Premier League referees that make mistakes. So a 15-year-old on his own in the middle of a pitch is not going to get everything right."

Regular spectator Emma Capon said she had witnessed arguments between adults at youth matches.

"You can see heated discussions. It can get aggressive. Pushing, shoving, fists can be flown as well.

"Any aggression, any frustration, any anger should be supressed. We are adults. It's not acceptable.

"It's an awful example to set," she added.

Dale Park Rangers coach Philip Denham said most people behaved appropriately, but incidents involving a minority could have a significant impact on young officials.

Refereeing could be "nerve-wracking" for under-18s, he said.

"When you watch a game on TV, you have multiple camera angles. You've normally got a really good view.

"When you're on a pitch and you've got three players stood between you and the ball ... you may not see what happens really well. So, you have your best guess."

He added: "It is not as common as people think it is. When it does happen it often goes way over the top."

Ben Pearce, head of safeguarding and football operations at Lincolnshire Football Association, said reported youth misconduct cases had fallen from 315 in 2024-25 to 270 in 2025-26.

He said pitch-side support, respect barriers and stronger sanctions had helped improve behaviour and encouraged more people to take up refereeing.

"All our referee courses are full," he said.

"It's pleasing to see that perhaps some of the attention around misconduct in the games is not deterring referees, particularly young ones."

A Football Association spokesperson said abuse of referees was "completely unacceptable" and that governing bodies would continue working to stamp out poor behaviour.

Despite his experiences, Toby said he had no plans to stop.

"It doesn't put me off. I just love my job," he said.

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