Fostering provides children with a safe and stable home when they are unable to live with their birth families.
For foster children under five, these early environments are especially important, shaping emotional security, development, and long-term wellbeing.
We spoke to Kate Taylor from Foster Care Associates, and Emma Finch from National Fostering Group to explore what fostering under-fives really involves.
What is foster care?
Foster care is a system designed to provide children with stability and safety when they cannot remain with their birth parents.
“This can be for a number of reasons and fostering can be short-term or long-term,” explains Kate.
Emma adds, “It provides a family environment, routines and structure, and a chance to thrive during a really difficult time.”
How do you become a foster parent?
To become a foster parent, you must go through an application and assessment process. The process can take four to eight months and is designed to ensure children are placed safely and appropriately.
“The process starts by making an enquiry to a fostering agency or local authority, followed by an initial visit, formal application, background checks, training, a full assessment and then a fostering panel to review your application,” says Emma.
Kate adds that the process includes multiple stages of preparation and safeguarding checks before approval is granted.
“The home visits, DBS checks, medical checks and training may seem overwhelming but they are all necessary to make sure children are going to be placed in a suitable home.”
Who can become a foster parent?
Emma says one of the biggest misconceptions is that fostering is limited to a specific type of person or household.
“You can be single, married, in a same-sex relationship, already a parent or not have any children of your own.
“As long as you’re able to provide a safe and stable home with a spare bedroom, you can foster a child. For under-fives there is also a non-smoking requirement.”
Legally, you must be at least 18 years old to foster, though most foster service providers will require you to be at least 21.
Do foster parents get paid?
All foster parents receive a foster care allowance to cover the cost of caring for a child. The minimum is usually between £170 and £299 a week, depending on where you live and the age of the foster child.
“Foster parents receive a weekly allowance to cover the cost of caring for the child, including essentials such as food, clothing, school uniforms etc.
“The total amount would depend on where you live, the child’s age or if the child has specific needs. The fostering service you apply to can guide you on this” says Kate.
How long can you foster a child for?
Fostering arrangements vary depending on the child’s individual care plan.
“Short-term fostering can last for a few days in emergencies, to up to around two years,” says Kate.
“Long-term fostering can last until a child turns 18 and even beyond that if they wish to stay with the family.”
Emma adds that outcomes depend on what is ultimately right for the child’s circumstances.
“Children may return home, move to adoption, or remain in long-term foster care depending on what is right for them. Social workers will always be available to talk to you and the child about their options to find out what’s best for them.”
How does fostering work for under-fives?
Fostering under-fives requires particularly careful matching due to the importance of early childhood development.
Some young children in foster care have experienced traumatic events and may need extra care.
“It’s such an important time for early development, so foster carers need to be able to dedicate time and attention to those needs,” explains Emma.
Kate says that day-to-day care focuses heavily on routine and developmental milestones.
“Young children need nurturing routines, bonding, and support with milestones such as walking, eating, potty training, and talking.”
Kate says that for children in foster care who may have experienced trauma, PACE is a therapeutic approach used to support them in their development towards self-awareness, emotional intelligence and resilience.
Rather than focusing on correcting behaviour, PACE encourages parents to slow down their reactions, stay calm and understand the feelings and experiences driving it.
P - Playfulness
Playfulness isn’t about making light of difficult emotions, but positivity and gentle interactions build trust. A warm, lighthearted and non-judgemental tone can help diffuse a tense situation.
For example, if a child is refusing to put their shoes on you could say, “It looks like your shoes are a bit shy today. Should we do a superhero pose to make them feel brave?”
A - Acceptance
Acceptance means recognising and validating a child’s thoughts and feelings without judgement. Even if you don’t agree with their perspective, it’s about helping them feel heard and understood, while still setting clear boundaries around unsafe behaviour.
If a child is angry or hurt you could say, “I didn’t realise you were upset. It’s okay to feel angry or hurt sometimes.”
C - Curiosity
Curiosity is about showing interest in what may be behind a child’s behaviour rather than making assumptions.
After accepting their feelings and showing you are there for them, you could ask, “I’m wondering if something happened today that made things feel difficult?”
E - Empathy
Empathy is about putting yourself in someone else's shoes, being present and helping them feel understood and supported. Rather than trying to fix or dismiss difficult feelings, showing empathy tells children that they don't have to face big emotions alone.
Instead of saying, “Don’t worry, it will be fine,” say, “That sounds really hard. I can see why you’re feeling upset and I’m here with you.”
