No Luv, We're Not In New York

Kevin Murphy

As I was sat in the departure lounge two couples sat next to me with two screaming little girls in tow, I thought 'God I hope they don't sit near me on the plane'. The flight was called, as I showed my ticket and passport the stench of body odour nearly knocked me to the floor. I looked round to see where this odour was originating from to find two sweet looking old ladies smiling at me, I thought 'God I hope they don't sit next to me on the plane.'

You've probably guessed already, I'm sitting on the plane I've got two little girls sitting right behind me screaming at the back of my head and the ladies with the personal hygiene problem are sat right next to me. Why do I get the feeling I'm not going to enjoy this flight? One of the old dears keeps touching me, please make her stop. ... (continues)