Befriending the man who killed my family

Thirty years after the genocide against the Tutsi in Rwanda, some convicted perpetrators are returning to the communities they once devastated.

For survivors, that return raises painful and deeply personal questions. How do you live alongside someone who helped destroy your family? What does forgiveness mean when the people who killed your loved ones are no longer far away, but back at home?

In this edition of Heart and Soul, Felin Gakwaya travels to eastern Rwanda to meet both survivors and perpetrators living side by side again. He hears from Daniel Gasangwa, who went to visit the men who killed members of his family after they were released from prison — and told them not to be afraid, because they had been forgiven. He also meets Steven Ngabonziza, whose own path to forgiveness came not first through church, but through war, prison discipline and the slow work of reconciliation. And he hears from Viateur Ruribikiye, a perpetrator who now speaks of confession, repentance and God’s pardon.

Through their stories, which include discussions of violence and loss, the programme explores forgiveness not as an abstract idea, but as something lived out in villages, churches, homes and memories that have not gone away.

[Photo description: Left To Right- Daniel, Felin, Viateur, Fulgence and Steven at Rwanda Prison Fellowship's office in Kicukiro-Kigali- Rwanda. Photo Credit: Felin Gakwaya]

Producer/presenter: Felin Gakwaya
Production co-ordinator: Mica Nepomuceno
Executive producer: Rajeev Gupta
Editor: Chloe Walker