Last year Ian Paisley and Peter Robinson hosted a well attended fringe meeting at the Tory conference in Bournemouth. But this year the DUP is notable by its absence. Has Westminster's fourth largest party got something against Blackpool? Is this a fit of pique given the Tory recruitment of Lord Trimble?
Ian Paisley has to attend the funeral of a church elder. Jeffrey Donaldson has an important meeting of his Stormont committee, which is taking evidence from the Lord Chief Justice. Others have ministerial commitments.
However, given the speculation about a November election, it's a surprise that no MLA or MP was able to make the trip. So far I haven't found anyone willing to stand up a rumour going around Tory circles that some DUPers applied but had a problem with their photo accreditation.
There's been an outbreak of "foot in mouth" disease at Stormont as MLAs struggle to get their tongues around the veterinary terms concerning the latest animal diseases to afflict GB. Sinn Fein's Francie Molloy referred to "blue tooth disease" which appears to be a new hi-tec strain of the condition now blighting English cows. The Ulster Unionist Danny Kennedy paid tribute to Agriculture Minister Michelle Gildernew's ability to get her teeth around the term when she fails to pronounce the words "Northern Ireland". Ms Gildernew came back by asking if Mr Kennedy was suggesting that she was suffering from "greentongue disease".
We are always hearing about the fat cats up here at Stormont, but could some of them be about to get thinner? Following some sounds of hilarity emanating from one basement office I came across Downtown Radio's Eamonn Mallie weighing in Deputy Speaker John Dallat. It turns out that Eamonn is pioneering what he calls a weight lotto - a weight loss club intended to raise some money for charity. He got roped in by Assembly Broadcasting's Nora Anne Barron, whose original idea it was. Apart from John Dallat, they are also press ganging a number of other politicos, including Deputy Speaker Francie Molloy, Finance Minister Peter Robinson, Environment Minister Arlene Foster and my colleague Jim Fitzpatrick, all of whom I would have thought were pretty svelte. They hope the politicians will turn up for weekly weigh ins.
Come to think of it, Eamonn does bear a remarkable resemblance to Little Britain's Marjorie Dawes.
Before anyone asks I'm not joining. If I lost any weight I'd have to move next door to the Ulster Hospital.
I'm 
